All of us crave some kind of romantic, intimate connection with another person. However, finding that special one can often be elusive especially in this fast paced, highly technological world. We’ve become what many have called a hi-tech low touch society where we can find ourselves in a text conversation that lasts all day, as opposed to simply having a drink or dinner with the same person that might only take 2 hours. Deep connections with others enhance our lives. We all want them, but don’t always know how to obtain them, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. Below are a few things to do in order to get ready for love.

The List

We’ve all heard about making a list of the qualities you want in a partner. This is vital when becoming available to meeting your mate, especially if you’ve been single for a while. In creating the list, you are saying two things – I am open to meeting the right person, and I am claiming and putting out to the Universe what I want for my life with this person. Another reason it is valuable to write your preferred list is when we meet someone after having been single for sometime, we’re usually so relieved and happy to have met the person that we become enamored with them for the attention they give us, and not for the actual person and their qualities. As a result, the relationship can fail because we didn’t choose the right person, we chose the attention. In this case lists are good because they hold us accountable for sticking to what we say we want in a love relationship. When writing the list, it should have 2 columns: Desires and Dealbreakers. The “Desires” column is what you want and the “Dealbreakers” column consists of what you need. The Desires side usually is a lot longer than the Dealbreakers and is usually filled with fantasy wishes like “he’ll always have washboard abs” or “he’ll always say the right things”. Dealbreakers, however, are items that you’ve thought long and hard about and that you are certain you cannot live without. By the way, cheating, physical, mental or emotional abuses, as well as drug/alcohol addiction are a few of the most common dealbreakers for both women and men.

Check Yourself

Are you ready for this? There’s a difference between being ready and being scared. If you’re scared… you can still get ready. Remember, you’re not alone. Especially these days, and the older we get – it can be daunting hoping to find “the one”. Check in with your self-confidence. For example, if you’re not feeling good about your physical appearance, gain more body confidence by joining a great dance class, yoga class, assess your eating habits, or if you tend to be anxious and stressed about the whole process, try Reiki to relax and recalibrate your energy (which can directly effect your feelings). This will boost your self-confidence. Also, look at your attitude. We need to be kind, respectful and warm toward others, if we expect the same. Lastly, be open for the adventure of courtship and expect to be pleasantly surprised by the whole process. Attitude is everything. Undoubtedly, you will draw unto you what you believe.

Online Dating

Be open to online dating. It’s not for everyone, but there are many people who have found their life partners, husbands and wives on dating sites. This is a positive where technology and love can come together for your betterment when you haven’t met someone the old-fashioned way.

Here are 3 important tips to remember when online dating: #1 It’s always best to make your first dates in a coffee/tea shop. This way, no one expects anything from you in exchange for coffee. #2 Don’t have anyone that you’ve never met pick you up at your home no matter how nice they seem on the phone or email. #3 Tell a good friend where and when you’re meeting the date. Safety first.

*Onlinedatingservices.net lists the top 10 dating services online including detailed descriptions of each site.

Wing Person

Every single individual should have one. When you’re becoming open to the dating world, it is common to go out for a drink or coffee in the hopes of meeting that special someone. This is best done with your “wing person”. Basically, a wing man/woman is a friend, usually of the same sex, who hangs out with you in a restaurant/bar while you’re hoping the person of your dreams will come by and show interest. They can act as a “look out” to spot your potential love interest for you. Also, a wing person is helpful because they provide a “buffer” between you and the potential love interest for relaxed, no pressure, introductory conversation should the love interest pop over for a chat. This is a wonderful scenario for getting to know someone in a fun, safe way – with your friend present. Furthermore, your wing man/woman is beneficial for emotional support throughout the entire dating process. Statistics show that when we feel supported and loved, we are more apt to attract the love we ultimately desire for our lives.

Daydree is a Reiki Master/Teacher who lives and works in Los Angeles. She is a registered member of International Association of Reiki Professionals (IARP). Click here for info and appts- MyOshun.com

Filed under: RELATIONSHIPS by myoshun